Sir Isaac Newton often told the story that he was inspired to formulate his theory of gravitation by watching the fall of an apple from a tree. Our name Ambrose has nothing to do with that story at all!
Our Ambrose was actually an American philosopher called Ambrose Gwinnett Bierce. He was an American editorialist, journalist, short story writer, fabulist, and satirist. All in one! Although we don’t agree with all of his beliefs we liked his directness and simple take on life.
Here are some of his quotes
Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.
Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
Optimism – the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.
History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
Meekness: Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worthwhile.
Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic.
Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.
Doubt, indulged and cherished, is in danger of becoming denial; but if honest, and bent on thorough investigation, it may soon lead to full establishment of the truth.
Sabbath – a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and was arrested on the seventh.
Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.
Friendless. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense.
Experience – the wisdom that enables us to recognise in an undesirable old acquaintance the folly that we have already embraced.
Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.